Best phone calls you've had!

Dandaps

Dandaps

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Just had one of the idiot phone calls.
Goes a bit like this.

Guy:- "hiya mate can you giz a price on a scaffold on a house"
Me:- Year sure whats it for"
Guy:- Just doin a fascia on front and gable. but can you do it as cheap as possible coz I was doin it on a youngman board but it's a bit dangerous and I've not priced it in when I quoted for the job"
Me:- Yer no worries we can do you a good deal blah blah blah"
Guy:-" oh cheers and I'm getting anouther job down road aswell so if you can do it cheap you can have that one aswell"

Later I ring him :-Hiya mate it's gonna cost X amount which is a decent price".

Guy:- er yer ok just give 2 mins will ring you back just got a call on the other line":cry:

I don't know why I entertain these phone calls I sometimes feel like hanging up after the first sentance.:mad:
Is it just me? Has anybody got any better one they want to share?
 
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Many many many calls.:(

Just 2 this week alone and I still have stupid Friday to come when all the dead heads want to empty their worries on a poor un-suspecting scaffolder so they can enjoy their weekend.

First one was an emergency job around 160 mile round trip from base. No time to price, or gauge the gear required or even how many men are needed to give him best value for cash as it needs to go up Tuesday despite the promise of pictures over a week ago. The boy's did it anyway and a real good job too, about double what he said it was. Just as the boy's leave the site he calls and say's, "Are the boy's back tomorrow?" Why would I send them back tomorrow, the job is done as requested. "it's just we think we might need another bit doing but we are not sure where or how much." Well, I'm no brain of fekin Britain, I am sure we all agree but here is a wee thought for you, why not wait till you know what the hell you are wanting and where you are needing it and then I will send the correct men with the correct material for the correct job.:(

Second one was only this morning. This wee job has been on the radar for a couple of weeks so we kinda knew a bit about it but the MC is flat out himself with work and whilst the customer has been putting pressure on him to get it done he really didn't want it up too quickly as he doesn't have the man power to get on with it straight away. Finally he can't take it any longer and calls this morning desperate it goes up today to shut the customer up. I asked him for specifics, like what you doing and what trades are working on it just to get an idea of how to build it. His answer was, we are not sure what we want where we want it but if you could just put a bit of scaffolding about there we will see what we can do with it.:eek:

Some times I think it must be me but FFS.:cry:
 
Had a phone call from a member of a multi-national service companys Human Resource department. The call went like this
HR manager "Fred, what is the name of the local radio station where you are?"
Me: "Spirit Radio Karratha. Why?"
HR manager: "We want to put an advert on as we are looking for Cryogenic Insulators"
Now bearing in mind Karratha is in the middle of nowhere. Population about 15,000 of which 90% are working in oil and gas industry. Temperatures can get up to 50C, average rent about 1500 quid a week so not the sort of place you hang about if not working.
Me:"I bet theres effing loads of them sat round here doing f all, listening to the radio hoping a job advert will come on".
HR manager:"Oh I see well have you got an idea we need these laggers desperately."
Me: "Hire a plane towing a big banner advertisement and fly it around the desert. That will should do it."
HR manager: "Ok thanks, I will look into it."
 
haha, you should have sent him to me, there's loads of these cryogenic laggers down my way.;)

---------- Post added at 10:55 AM ---------- Previous post was at 10:54 AM ----------

Wait a minute, cancel that I thought you said dossers.
 
The best one is "can you give me a quote over the phone"
Me:- "well its hard to quote over the phone, it's better if we call over and have a look
get you a more accurate price"
Then the famous " Well I just wanted a BALLPARK figure"
 
had a call years ago,my then number was like a taxi number,so about 1.30 am satday nite,some drunk rings my phone by mistake,so he asks for a taxi,being peed off about the call ,i said were you going mate,he said were he wanted to go,i said about ten minutes ,then unplugged my phone,went to sleep laughing that nite.
 
Dandaps said:
The best one is "can you give me a quote over the phone"
Me:- "well its hard to quote over the phone, it's better if we call over and have a look
get you a more accurate price"
Then the famous " Well I just wanted a BALLPARK figure"
Click to expand...

Haha the famous 'just give me a rough idea'

Always ends in tears that one!
 
hahahaha had a bloke phone up asking for scaffold price ,

him: hello mate i need a price
me : ok then can you tell me what you need , for how long etc etc
him: i need it to be Cheap

so i hang up the phone

2 minutes later he phones back saying i think we got cut of

me: no mate you got the wrong company this aint " cheap scaffolding ltd "
him: oh so you dont do scaffolding then
me: yes mate we do
him: iam confused
me: Bye :)
 
Had one asian guy ring me.
Says :-Hi i want price on scaffold for my building 14m long by 20m high in middle of manchester.
Me:- Ok no problem can I arrange to come and visit so we can see exactly wants needed.

Guy:-NO I HAVE TOLD YOU WHAT IT IS YOU SCAFFOLD EXPERT YOU SHOULD KNOW!!

Me thinking its a wind up starts to chuckle and say :-ok I am scaffold expert yes but I still need to look to see the exact requirements.

Guy:- NO YOU GIVE ME PRICE !! ON WHAT I HAVE TOLD YOU.

Me :- laughing. then the guy hangs up.
So when I get back to yard I tell one of the lads can he phone this fella back and arrange a visit. while I work on anouther quote. Im sat there one eye up from the paper I'm reading dying in stitches of laughter. whilst my mate phones this guys back and gets an earfull about this job. turns out it was a genuine call,
 
off my missis at half 6 in mornin from bein out nite before say, do u no what the fcukin time is n where r u? i'm errrrrrr, in the shed couldn't find my key so had to stop in there, i've never ran home so fcukin faast in my life lol :laugh:
 
For these daft phone calls we all get, rather than give a price blind over the phone, I use google earth it has a measure tool, you can view the front count brick courses, and see what your up against as the customer will never tell you there is a big b&stard tree right in the way, ok you can't see the back to a certain extent but it paints a better picture of the job, don't know if any one else does this and also saves money on diesel looking at it.


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I am here: http://tapatalk.com/map.php?bycbyw
 
Yeah, I use it but never managed to work out the measuring tool and some times can be quite deceptive as not all information is visible. A good guide for sure but wary of things like power cables and conservatories round the back.
 
stop bein tight gits n go out look at the job win it n give ya lads plenty of work... that wot runnin a buisness all about lol, if ya don't wanna run about lookin at jobs i'll do it for a SMALL fee lol
 
i get really annoyed wiv sales calls - coldcalling for mobilephones,debt collecting loads of differnt shiiit i normally take them aback after they've said all there speal i simply ask
"do you want any scaffolding"
to which the confused sounds or relpy is something like
"sorry i dont understand"
quick as a flash in a raised voice comes
"well when i wanna buy your product i'll phone you,and when you wanna have some scaffolding you ring me - but untill then fuccck off wasting my time "
line normally goes dead then lolo
 
scaffatron said:
For these daft phone calls we all get, rather than give a price blind over the phone, I use google earth it has a measure tool, you can view the front count brick courses, and see what your up against as the customer will never tell you there is a big b&stard tree right in the way, ok you can't see the back to a certain extent but it paints a better picture of the job, don't know if any one else does this and also saves money on diesel looking at it.


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I am here: http://tapatalk.com/map.php?bycbyw
Click to expand...

our gaf use's it google earth and google street view and as of l8 his jobs ahve been spot on in sizing lol but save him sticking his hand over the fenc wid hios camera to get snapshot of the job so his knee hight to timthumb lol
 
It's especially good for funky Friday when someone wants a job looking at about 3 o clock and all you want to do is go for a couple of dust busters, f&ck that give us the post code and I will ring you from the pub. :)


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I am here: http://tapatalk.com/map.php?fqbf4e
 
(customer)Whys this scaffold still up we told the builder two weeks ago it could come down.
(me) First I've heard of it.
 
Best call ive had???

The Doctor ringing me to tell me i did NOT have Bowl Cancer...
 
Was he taking part 1's and paying digs?

---------- Post added at 07:25 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:23 PM ----------
Jason-Gibbs said:
Best call ive had???

The Doctor ringing me to tell me i did NOT have Bowl Cancer...
Click to expand...

FFS Jase, don't quite know what else to add without sounding insulting. I suppose that trumps us all if it was a possibility.
 
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